Learn Something New Everyday!

I actually don't see how you couldn't do this. Instead of making it a point to learn something new everyday, I think you'd have to make a point of stopping yourself from learning something new. I'm not only considering academics or book learning, but also career knowledge (which for me happens to be a lot of academics and book learning), social, political and pop culture, personal life lessons, intended and unintended, and the list could go on and on.
Here are three new things I learned yesterday:

At work, with the help of a colleague, I learned more about My Access. I learned how to import students, set up groups and assign a prompt. The day before, with the help of another colleague, I learned how to use the student results to know what types of lessons/teaching I should focus on. End result: I will learn more about what my students know and also learn what to do to help them learn more! Win win!

At a social function with friends, I learned that kids only have to be "shielded" from seeing alcohol depending on the type of liquor license you have. I'm surprised that parents aren't given some sort of partition to place around the alcoholic beverages on their table to keep their children "unaware." Speaking of children and alcohol, here's a previous post about Porter playing "bar." I already knew that Utah's liquor laws were a little quirky, but I learned last night that they are actually totally absurd. For example, you can't "travel" with your beverage, meaning that if you are at one table and move to another with your drink, then set it down, you've broken the law. And that it takes two people to order a pitcher of beer, but one person can order an entire bottle of wine AND a shot of tequila and be served both at the same time because that is considered only two drinks.

My awesome friend Vickie also tried to teach us the proper way to take a great picture, as in pose for a picture. Something like sit up straight, one shoulder down, chin towards that shoulder, head tilted to opposite shoulder, chest out, and something about creating an S? Still learning.

One last thing I learned from Instagram is that KPop is all the rage, or will be all the rage. Basically it's VERY popular Korean pop music by Korean girl and boy bands. Feel free to check it out!

PHEW! I wonder what new things I'll learn today? Tomorrow? Next week? Next year?

September 20, 2010 "Back to School"

We’re all back in school to varying degrees. I’ve been back to work going on seven weeks now. The highlight of the school year so far, going to my first Quincenera for a former student. This year I’m back in the classroom full time teaching health, and love being with the puberty ridden adolescents I teach. Other than that I don’t want to make an exhausting and challenging situation worse so I won’t do a lot of complaining, other than to say it really bites that it’s the norm for me to leave the house before anyone’s up and get home after the boys are in bed. Though it’s once or twice a week, it is happening with more frequency than any other time in my career, and I really don’t care for it. I have always usually been able to do either the morning routine and get the kids off to school, or do the after school pick up routine. Unfortunately I am able to do neither this year because of a grant our school received. Fortunately our nanny is back from last year and my niece who lives with us is also able to fill in. I just can’t imagine what I would do without my village. (Both the nanny and the niece are 18 years old yet constantly mistaken for Parker’s mother. I am old enough to be the nanny and niece’s mom!)

This is Porter’s fifth week at school. He’s in fifth grade and I’m trying to stay focused on the here and now because imagining him in junior high two years from now is enough to make me ask for the doctor to up my meds. Porter is definitely a character, very much his own person. He’s still unbelievably social and curious. He still loves to play outside and would probably live outside if we let him. And he’s more technologically advanced than I am. Since he doesn’t have a cell phone, he figured out how to text our phones using his email account. One night I tried it, and after a half hour of not being able to figure it out (we all know how precious time is) I called for Porter to show me how to do it. I still can’t figure out how he did it out in the first place. I think technology will be his saving grace.

For Parker it’s just his third week of school. He attends a Montessori preschool 3 mornings a week and a public school preschool 4 afternoons a week. He’s still small, but growing. He thinks he’s four going on forty. He will often decide to leave the house, through the front door, with car keys in hand (I still haven’t found mine from yesterday). He will attempt to get into a vehicle. He manages to do this under the supervision of 1-3 adults, depending on the day and time. This either says something about our supervisory skills (each one thinks he’s with someone else) or it says something about Parker’s determination and stealth. I just hope he’s not trying to pull these stunts at school.

As a teacher it’s quite amazing to think that parents give their most precious possessions to us for the day. As a parent it can be a very scary thing to do, especially when communication is an issue as it is with my boys. I’m just thankful that their teachers and the staff members at their schools have taken the time to get to know them. Though I do worry about their academic progress, more than anything I want to know my children are loved and cared for while at school.

November 2, 2009 "...celebrate everything"

  

This year we were members of the rock band KISS. Porter’s into KISS, mostly because his best buddy Liam is into KISS (which is also why Porter has defected from the Patriots to the Bengals).  I started with basic black, then embellished with lots of silver. Clint, always a little reluctant, helped with the masks. (I should clarify that he’s not reluctant to help, just to the idea of having to dress up.)
Halloween isn’t really one of our favorite holidays. It’s a holiday that kind of creeps up on us. All of a sudden it’s here and then we’re stressed to complete costumes. But the actual dressing up, hanging out with friends, and trick-or-treating is very fun. And it’s a reason to celebrate, right?

“Until further notice, celebrate everything…” Just last week I was given that saying on a sign made for me by my dear friend’s dear mother. Celebrating everything is what I do a lot of the time. I feel like “celebrating” the different aspects of my life, all the different situations I find myself in, all the people I associate with, and all that I learn along the way. That may sound a little cheesy, or like overkill, but I mean it.

I had a hard day last Friday, probably the first real “bad” day since chemo ended. But it wasn’t too bad, just a little on the unpleasant side compared to all the wonderful days I’ve had over the past two years. And it was actually a buildup of several situations over a few weeks added to a sleep deprived state that finally made me hit a wall. I just let some things get to me that I shouldn’t have regarding interactions with colleagues. In the midst of my pity party, someone said something to me that helped me snap out it. “I can understand how you feel bad about not having any friends,” at work. What? Wait a minute, is that what it sounds like I’m saying? What I meant was that I’m just not really enjoying some of the treatment I’m getting from some of my colleagues. And guess what, they’re not my friends, and thank goodness. Not so sure that I want mean people to be my friends. And another thing, I do have some great friends that I work with, and that’s where my focus and energy should be.
So, I quickly refocused on the friends that are in my heart, both at work and elsewhere, and I became so overcome with emotion so quickly, it really felt as though my heart would burst. I really am so incredibly fortunate to have such wonderful people in my life. And that’s something absolutely worth celebrating.

“… celebrate everything…” because you never know when the event, person, item, relationship, etc… will be gone.

August 30, 2009 "Back to School"

“I gotta go back, back, back to school again… Whoa whoa, I gotta go….Back to School….AGAIN!” Porter loves Grease, especially Danny Zuko, so I thought that would be a fitting intro for this post.  Just like many others, we all headed back to school this week. Parker started preschool and Porter started fouth grade. I went back to work the week before, the kids came back this week. I also started school, again. I’m taking a couple of classes towards my admin license. I’m just a school junkie!

So, our tiny Parker started school. Hard to believe he’s 3. He’s still not there in clothes size, but he has grown, a little. Clint has been very worried about Parker going to school. He is being transported by bus from daycare, two mornings a week. Clint has had very disturbing thoughts of Parker getting lost, left on the bus, wandering off without notice, etc…. “He’s just so small…” Clint made a plan to observe the drop off process and after dropping Porter off, went straight over to Parker’s school. I called him later that morning to see how it went. Clint said, “I think I made it worse,” and I replied, “Made what worse?” Then Clint tells me how Parker started crying when he saw Clint. “WHAT? He saw you?” Ay yi yi! “You didn’t just watch from the truck?” “No, I got out and he saw me,” then Clint went on to explain the exiting process, the adult to kid ratio, and how Parker got “carried” off the bus and the other kiddos got help “walking” off. Needless to say, Clint seems to feel okay with the process now. Phew!

Apparently, there is a party at Porter’s school each morning before the bell. He walked to school one morning with his best buddy, which I wasn’t aware of until the next morning (Clint gets him ready for school and I had a couple late nights away from home this week). He was begging to call his buddy (at 7 a.m.) to see if he wanted to walk again. I told him he had to wait a little while; it was just too early to be calling people. Then he told me about how they walked, got to school early, and “Mom, it’s like a party! Kids are playing football and basketball. We’re talking and hanging out!” Wow! I’m not sure that I’ve ever heard school described in quite that way, but I’m definitely excited that he’s still excited about school. It amazes me, that in spite of his challenges, he enjoys school so much, and it’s not just the social aspect, he loves to learn, even if he doesn’t do it in quite the same way as other kids.

As for me, I’m not a classroom teacher this year. I’m the data specialist for our school, a new position and one I’ll be inventing and reinventing along the way. I’m excited to work towards improving instruction for our students, which means working on equity and the achievement gap. My admin classes and job go together nicely, and it doesn’t hurt that I should have a more flexible schedule. Though I do miss having students, I still get to see the ones I had last year, and hope to be getting to know the incoming seventh graders too!

August 3, 2009 "Moments"

“Live in the moment.” This is much easier said than done. It’s definitely become much easier for me to do because of all that’s happened in my life, especially the threat of life ending. So I did that, especially well this past week while I was in San Diego for a business/pleasure trip. I worked hard and played equally hard. While in class, I was focused on the task(s) at hand. When out and about, I enjoyed whatever it was we happened to be doing. I didn’t worry too much about before or later, tomorrow or next, what ifs or might have beens. I just lived in the now, the moment as it was happening. This is probably why “Feel out of sorts; not sure where to start?” was my facebook post upon my return.

I do feel a little out of sorts. I finished a big project before I left on my trip. I finally got our master bedroom totally and completely unpacked (after having moved in 3 years ago). Laundry was caught up before I packed and my mom and Clint did other various cleaning and home projects in my absence. While away, I did not watch tv, not once, didn’t even turn it on. I also didn’t read any newspapers, which I do on a daily basis while home. My life consisted of learning about AVID (Advancement Via Individual Determination)and vacationing in San Diego.

I managed to talk to my family each day I was gone. Porter had a meltdown a couple of days before I was going to leave, afraid that I would somehow “die” while away, or on the way, or when on the way back. He ended up going with Clint to take me to the airport and was fine about it. But something happened with Porter that made me feel that I missed a big moment here. He went from a size 3 shoe to a size 5! How is this possible in a week’s time! How could my “big boy baby” grow up like that! Whoa! Slow down! Truth be told, his 3s were probably a little too small, and the 5s a bit too big, but still. Parker also looked much more grown up, due no doubt to a week on grandma’s feeding schedule.

It took a full day for my body to recover, sleeping most of the day after my return. I call this the “vacation hangover.” My mind is still recovering, which is the “not sure where to start,” comes in. I’ve been easing back into normalcy. I’m caught up on news, updated my book journal, and have been playing with Parker and reading. Truth is, this is not normalcy either. Normal will be when I return to work after 2 more weeks of summer vacation. I don’t want to think about it, so I’m going back to living in the moment, starting with this moment.

June 25, 2009 "Does Size Matter?"

We just had Parker’s 3 year well child check-up (a month late). His stats include a weight of 23 pounds and height of 35 inches. He’s still a tiny tot! I have to admit, I’m a little worried about his stunted size, even though I realize that kids who have Down Syndrome do tend to be on the small side. In fact, the average height for an adult male with Down Syndrome is 5 feet and ½ of an inch. Parker looks more like an 18-24 month old, so it surprises many that he is actually 3. He has 3 cousins, all little girls, all a year younger than him, and all bigger than he is. But I must note that he is actually barely on the “typical” growth chart at 5% for height and 3% for weight. I have a friend whose experience is on the other end of the spectrum. Her oldest son was 32 pounds and 32 inches at 1year old, and over 100% on the growth chart. He’s maintained that and is currently going into the 6th grade at over 5 feet and 3 inches.
There really aren’t any drawbacks to his size, there are actually a lot of perks! He’s been in size 3 diapers (16-28 pounds) for well over a year (we’re hoping to get him out of them by the end of the summer). We get the best use out of his clothes. He still fits perfectly in his crib and probably will for awhile which will help keep him confined while sleeping. And the best perk of all, he’s not too big to carry around, hold, and cuddle with.
So does size matter? It seems to. I’m always hearing too big, too small, too fat, too thin, too heavy, too this, too that… I really don’t think I ever hear anything like just right or perfectly fine. Just take a look at these two boys,  both in 7^th grade. I find it interesting that there is soooo much size variation between the middle school boys I teach. And even though it’s a physically developmental time in their lives, there is still a lot of teasing regarding stature, especially for those with small or short stature. And doesn’t this continue into adulthood?
The young girls I teach also face issues regarding size, but instead of height, it’s breast size and weight. There is less variation in height for adolescent girls. Adolescence for girls is a time when their bodies develop a shape, and it seems that for the most part, most girls are not happy, not satisfied, not comfortable with, not confident about the shape of their bodies. And again, this continues into adulthood. I know women who have had or talk of having breast augmentations as well as breast reductions, tummy tucks and liposuction.So is bigger really better? More height, bigger boobs, SUVs, huge homes, and enormous food portions? That’s the American way, right? But bigger really isn’t always better, as is seen with all the health risks associated with obesity. Size also matters, from early on into adulthood it seems to be a constant issue. Let’s all be a little easier on ourselves and one another, worry less, be more accepting, and celebrate the unique attributes each individual has. I’ll start by saying that Parker is the perfect size for him! 

June 13, 2008 "Reminder"

What you’ll read below was orignally posted on my Caring Bridge page. I’m posting it again because I need a reminder to continue to enjoy life’s moments. My summer vacation just started, and will continue for the next 9 weeks. I want to be sure to insert spontaneity into the structure of our summer schedule. We definitely have things we need to accomplish, but overall we need to enjoy one another and the moments we share together. I still don’t wear watches, and still don’t have a clock in my classroom (it drives the kids nuts!).

TUESDAY, JANUARY 01, 2008 01:26 AM, CST
GIFTS
I used to be obsessed with time. I’d get a new watch every Christmas, different styles and colors to go with different clothes. I currently have 5 watches right now and only one of them is working. It’s the “night, night” watch, my Timex with the Indiglo. I’ve stopped wearing watches because I no longer want time to have control over me, I want control over it. It’s nice to slow down, breathe and enjoy the moments. In fact, I don’t have a clock in my classroom. I replaced it with a sign that says, “Time is passing, are you?” So this is one of the “gifts” cancer gave me.

It’s difficult for me to say that cancer gave me anything good, though I know it did. I just don’t want to give credit for wonderful things to something so hideous. Cancer also gave me a sense of freedom or liberation. I don’t think you would have caught me dancing on a piano at the Tavernacle or on a table at the Contempo company party a year ago. But since I’m living more in the moment, and caring a lot less about what other people think, I expect to have more spontaneous and joyful experiences in the future!

I’ve also experienced some what of a rebirth over the past year. I did not particulary enjoy being reduced to a completely flat chested and hairless woman. But who remembers growing hair from nothing? Since it probably happened in infancy, I don’t think anyone remembers, especially girls. I know that guys shave their heads from time to time, so they get it. So not only do I get to experience a facet of infancy, I get to experience puberty too! My doctor says my breasts are puberty size right now. Funny that he says that because I think I might be a little bigger now than I was last year at this time, and that’s only with 150 ccs in each side.

One other “gift” was there all along, all the wonderful people in my life. I already knew that I had a fabulous family, friends, neighbors, and coworkers and now medical staff. But my appreciation for them has grown and so has my need to spend more time with them. I also enjoy every moment, just about. Simple moments, quiet moments, quick moments, living in the moment. It’s a fun way to spend time with my boys, my big boy, little boy and baby boy. Don’t let Porter know I called him a little boy.

June 11, 2009 "Drama"

I know misery. It’s being incapacitated to the level of not even being able to watch tv, trying not to hate your prepubescent and hairless body, feeling the excruciating pain of your bones creating more white blood cells, and attempting to survive a treatment that feels like it’s killing you without wishing you were dead. That’s misery, and I want to be as far from it as possible.

I never really understood the advice of “Live each day as if it were your last,” until being diagnosed with breast cancer. For me that advice came to mean that I would make a conscious effort to enjoy each day, to recognize that there was some good in everyone and everything, and to be present in each moment. I put those beliefs into practice by living my life a day at a time and making a choice to be happy each day.

My personal life philosophy is causing some difficulty in my professional life. There has been a lot of conflicts at work this year. It has been a year of transition and change for a few reasons, the most significant being a new administration. Anxiety and stress levels are through the roof, I recognize that. People are frustrated, I get that. There are feelings of anger, despair, and hopelessness, I feel that. The majority of those I work with seem miserable and as I mentioned above, I want to be as far from misery as possible.

So some assume that I’m in denial about what’s going on at work or that I’m clueless or cold, or that I lack empathy, or that I don’t care when in reality I have just chosen to respond to the situation in a different way.
The perception has become that because I’m not “with” them that I must be against them. I don’t believe that it’s that black and white. Just because you’re not “with” a group, doesn’t mean that you’re against them, but that’s the line that’s been drawn.

 I have not been mean or malicious to anyone. I have not mistreated anyone. I have been snubbed and ignored by others. I have been left out and ostracized as well. I do appreciate those few individuals who have taken the time to test the assumptions by asking me directly about my perceived “motives.” I tell them that I’m just trying my best to do more than survive this life, but that I’m trying to get enjoyment out of my life by having positive interactions and experiences. I don’t think that’s something that I should be made to feel guilty about or have to apologize for.   

June 9, 2009 Class of ?

Tomorrow marks the end of yet another school year, my 14^th to be exact. Actually, more like my 32^nd if I start with Kindergarten. So off go another group of students, to enjoy summer break, then to learn more in high school and then continuing on to their adult futures, whatever that happens to be. What dreams will they realize, what challenges will they overcome, what contributions will they make? If I’m lucky, I’ll hear from some of them from time to time, and hopefully it won’t be bad news.

Unfortunately the first follow up I had with a former student was at a funeral, his. I recognized his picture in the obituary section of the paper, he had committed suicide. Shocking, unbelievable, devastating. What had happened in the past 5 or 6 years? What could have driven him to end his life at such a young age? I was heartbroken.

The students I had my first year are turning 27. I’m only 10 years older than they are, which doesn’t seem as big of a difference now as it did then. I taught these children when they were going through puberty, and now they’re full grown adults. I’ve had some interesting student encounters over the years.
During one of our Girls’ Night Out evenings we (many of us in the group were teachers or former teachers of the same school) ran into a group of former students at the piano bar downtown. I have to admit it was a little awkward, but it was also great to see them.
While teaching preschool at an elementary a few years ago, a young man asked me if I had been a teacher at any other schools. He ended up being a former student of mine who was at the elementary picking up his daughter who was in kindergarten!
Not too long ago I had a very nice lunch with a former student who just recently graduated and was starting his career in real estate. I had kept up on his life through his mother who I ran into from time to time when she substituted at school.
Last year, there were 5 student teachers at our school. One seemed so familiar, and I expressed that to her. She revealed to me that I was her teacher in 8^th grade. She was now all grown up and pursuing a career as a teacher.
There have also been a few substitute teachers that were my students, as well as a paraprofessional that currently works at my school. Some I just hear about, from other teachers, students, parents, etc…

So off go another group of students, and I’m hoping they realize how important they are and wishing them the best life has to offer them.

Schools out for summer!