Tonight during class I sent off a text to the sitter to see how things are going with Porter. She texts back letting me know that Porter has been sad because of Rachael. I ask for a little more info. It took a couple of texts and a conversation with Porter to piece it all together, but I finally got it figured out.
Rachael’s grandparents live a few houses away. She visits them often and plays with all the kids in the neighborhood. She is a VERY nice, thoughtful, and cute little girl. Porter has known her for 3 years, but this summer he began to develop a “romantic” interest in her. He talks about her often and a couple of weeks ago told me he wanted to ask her to be his girlfriend. I told him two things: he’s too young to have a girlfriend and she was too old for him anyway. Rachael is twelve and Porter is nine. Porter countered with, “How old are you?” I tell him, and then, “And how old is Dad?” I answer that too. “See, Dad’s older than you are.” Yes, but a three year difference is a lot less at our age than it is at his.
Today he went over to Rachael’s grandparent’s house and asked for her phone number, which they gave to him. He then used his sitter’s phone to call her. He told her he thought she was beautiful, nice, and that he loved her. Then he asked Rachel to be his girlfriend. Porter told us that she turned him down because he was only nine. Which is exactly what we emphasize when we talk to him about this whole situation, “You are only nine…. There will be plenty of time for girls and dating when you get older…. You are too young to have a girlfriend….” He said it would be nice to have someone to hold and cuddle with, and of course we agreed, though again emphasizing that there will be plenty of that for him in the future.
Clint told Porter how proud he was that he showed such courage to call a girl and tell her how he felt, even if it didn’t turn out the way he wanted. We talked to him about heartache and that he would most likely experience a lot more of it. And that though now wasn’t the time for this romance to happen, who knows what’s in store for the future. “But I’m the love master,” a self-appointed title.
After a little more discussion, we just laid it out for him and told him, bottom line, he would not be dating anyone at nine years old. It just wasn’t going to happen. Then Clint goes on to explain the parameters under which it would happen, “You’ll be sixteen, or close to it. It will probably be to a school type function.” Whoa, whoa, whoa. We don’t need to discuss this now, do we? And after Porter’s next comment, I’m pretty sure he wasn’t listening to Clint at all anyway. He says, “I want to make out.” Excuse me? And where did you get that from? Thank you Uncle Jesse from Full House, Porter’s new favorite show and second favorite “cool guy.” (His first favorite cool guy is Danny Zuko.)
I am so proud of Porter, of course right? I’m his mom. But it’s more than that, I’m amazed by him. Nothing stands in his way, not his disability, not his speech difficulties, not his age, nothing. I worry about him, probably as much as any parent worries about their child, but then he does something as brave and bold as this and I know, I just know that he’s not only going to be just fine, but that he is just fine now, and in fact so much more than that, he’s AMAZING!
No comments:
Post a Comment